SAN DIEGO, CA – The San Diego Zoo did nothing to stop a tiger from murdering and partially eating a man who jumped over the barrier and into the tiger exhibit illegally.
“Too often you see this happen in the news and you hear about the poor innocent animal being shot and killed to save the dumbass who entered the exhibit. Well, not today. If we stop murdering the animals and let them tear apart the stupid fucks that enter the exhibits, then maybe it won’t happen anymore,” said zoo official Bertha Kickington.
The zoo announced that the man’s partially consumed and rotting corpse will remain on exhibit with Sasha the tiger to munch on as she pleases through the end of the week.