‘You Ain’t American if the Flag Doesn’t Arouse You’ MAGA Supporter Claims

DALLAS, TX – Eric Grunderson was arrested at the Dallas Juggarnauts High School Football game on Sunday after multiple people in the stands witnessed him being aroused during the singing of the National Anthem.

Grunderson allegedly had an American flag wrapped around him to try and hide the fact that he was doing the dirty deed.

This isn’t the first time that Grunderson has been arrested for such a thing. During a 4th of July parade last year, Grunderson was arrested a similar act during the fireworks display. His ex-wife Patti tells us that these aren’t isolated incidents either.

“He would only be able to get turned on from patriotic things,” said Patti while weeping into a tissue.

“When we would have intercourse, he would drape an American flag with a hole cut out of it over my body while God Bless America was playing. He has a real problem.”

Not everyone thinks that Grunderson has a problem, his brother Bill being one. 

“My brother Eric just loves this country so much, the same as a man loves a woman, so I really don’t see what the problem is. He’s not hurting anyone.”