NEWARK, NJ – After attending a small gathering of 309 people to celebrate Halloween, a local New Jersey woman is utterly confused about how she got COVID-19 after attending a large party. The report comes after, Adrian Bolly, 26, attended a Halloween party that had 309 guests in a two-bedroom apartment and began to experience […]Read More
Tags : covid
DETROIT, MI – Parents Bob and Belinda Bullbum are willing to risk their three young children getting COVID-19 on Halloween tomorrow by still taking them Trick or Treating. This is despite multiple federal, state, and local warnings to stay home and avoid Trick or Treating due to the massive surge in COVID-19 cases. The Bullbum’s […]Read More
SAN ANTONIO, TX-After sitting around in his misery questioning reality mourning the death of his wife and two children, local man Dale Jeans is feeling a bit better knowing he has a blueberry muffin to comfort him. The report comes after Jeans contracted COVID-19 and exposed his entire family to the virus by mistake. Shortly […]Read More
PITTSBURGH, PA – Resident idiot, 56-year-old Bill Tweedendorfer doesn’t understand how he tested positive for COVID-19. He claims to have worn a mask at all times in public. “First our governor forces me against my rights to wear a mask in public, but I listen, cus ya know I need to buy groceries. But then […]Read More
Trump Claims Sacrificing School Children is a Sacrifice He’s Willing to Make for Slight Economy Bump
WASHINGTON – Following the ongoing pandemic and questions amidst the upcoming school year, President Donald Trump reportedly wants schools to be fully open and running for a slight economy bump, despite the evidence children will die as a result. “Once I heard the mainstream media wants the school to stay for some virus, I knew […]Read More