NEW YORK CITY – After their professor gave permission to listen to anything they wanted while working on their assignments, a group of soulless Columbia University students proudly exclaimed their love for classic rock.
“Whenever someone asks me what I listen to, I throw on thunderstruck by AC/DC, and look them directly in the eye declaring my love for classic rock. I don’t like anything else and I’m proud of it,” said Student John Mello.
“I’m so sick of these fucking students playing dad rock like they’re cool or some shit. I had enough of that shitty music in high school. Some of it is great, but they’re just listening to generic hits. I can’t take it anymore,” said Professor Doug Ben.