Report: Life Still Terrible in the U.S. Despite Favorite Football Team Winning Playoff Game

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January 19, 2021
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GREEN BAY, WI – With the Green Bay Packers winning a playoff game this past weekend, many Packers fans are ecstatic about the win, only to realize life is still terrible in the U.S. despite the win.

“I was really excited to see the packers win and my happiness for it lasted a bit. Unfortunately, I came to reality soon after and realized life still sucks, especially when the U.S. is arguing about $2,000 checks and shit,” said Packers fan Stefon Mandre.

“Nowadays, we have people arguing against raising the minimum wage, which is even more ridiculous. I don’t know what to do anymore. This is really bumming me out and I’m pissed about all this.”