Politician Who Has Never Struggled in Their Life Simply Doesn’t Understand How $1,400 is Different than $2,000

WASHINGTON – With many Americans eagerly awaiting some form of stimulus support from the U.S. government, most U.S. politicians who have never struggled in their life are reportedly confused on how $1,400 is different than $2,000.

“I honestly don’t think anyone needs a stimulus. After all, we already gave them $1,200 and $600 so how much more could they need. How much even is rent nowadays? A hundred bucks or something?” said Maine Senator Susan Collins.

“In reality, $1,400 should help people out for years. After all, when I was a kid, my dad used to give me $2,000 a week if I was nice to him. At the time, I was able to buy a bunch of nice clothes and cars, which is why I don’t think most people need a stimulus.”