AMERICA – It’s unpopular opinion time here at Sad Carrot News. The common trope or superstition or whatever the fuck you want to call it of saying bless you or god bless you is a stupid fucking formality that needs to be ended. The worst part is no one seems to know why they say it.
“We say it to ward off the demons and thank god for allowing us to sneeze,” said evangelical Christian Karen Karenston.
“I have no idea why we say it but we absolutely have to say it because it’s the right thing to do and if you don’t say it then that means you’re just not a good person,” said competitive hot dog eater Ronnie Molasses.
Reporters couldn’t be bothered to look up whatever the stupid fucking origin is to saying bless because who gives a fuck. The most alarming part is if you don’t say bless you when someone sneezes, everyone around you thinks you’re an asshole when in reality the people saying it are the real assholes.