New Study Shows That Anyone Who Still Wears Their High School Ring is Weird as Fuck
STANFORD, CA – A new study out of Stanford University shows that anyone who still wears their high school ring after they are done with high school is weird as fuck and a potential serial killer.
The study shows that these people have a much higher rate of being reclusive or if married, lead a secret second life of sexual deviance. The scientists who led the study are advising everyone to avoid those who still wear their high school rings at all costs.
“This study just shows what we all already knew, that anyone still wearing their high school ring is a fucking weirdo. I mean the things are ugly cheap pieces of garbage so I don’t know why you’d choose to wear one but if you do, then you’re fucked and I’m staying away from you,” said lead scientist Maximilian Quartermain.