New Sleep Mask Injects Heroin Directly Into Neck, Causing Users a Euphoric and Jovial Sleeping Experience

HOUSTON, TX – The American mattress store Mattress Firm has recently announced a new sleep mask, Sleep Time Fun Sleep Mask, that injects heroin directly into users’ necks, causing a euphoric and jovial sleeping experience for anyone interested.

Many were hesitant to use the new sleep mask due to the stigma attached to heroin itself, but after trying it out, lines have been going around the block for the new product.

“I drink on occasion but after trying this bad boy out, there’s nothing else I want to do but relax and sleep. It’s quite amazing what a little bit of heroin can do,” said sleep mask enthusiast Auston Mani.