Music World Mourns As Ted Nugent is Found Still Alive

AMERICA – Musicians and music industry professionals all across America are in mourning today at the news that Ted Nugent hasn’t died yet and is still alive.

Nugent, the massive piece of human filth and pedophile, is known for his extreme right-wing views and racist, islamophobic, and homophobic rhetoric.

“I woke up this morning and just felt like oh my god maybe he’s dead, so I google it and nothing. It really ruined my day. I got so excited when he was really sick with Covid but he somehow survived that and he basically eats red meat for every meal, so when will this fucker just die already,” said Neil Young.

Scientists from Stanford University have confirmed that the continued existence of a garbage human-like Ted Nugent is proof that there is no god.