EL PASO, TX – 33-year-old Roger Beastie pulled every single one of his teeth out so that he can enjoy eating popcorn without getting any kernels in his teeth.
“Popcorn is by far my favorite food but it’s such a pain in the ass to eat. Every time I’d have to go floss when I was done to get all the stuck popcorn kernels out and even then I’d still have some stuck in my teeth for days. So I decided to fix this problem by ripping all of my teeth out,” said Beastie.
Beastie told reporters that it’s harder to chew popcorn or any food now that he only has his gums and he’s alienated all of his friends and family with his new look. Beastie concluded by saying that it’s all worth it now that popcorn doesn’t get stuck in his mouth anymore.