FAYETTEVILLE, AR – Ronnie Tobacwad and his friends Ronald Mong, and Ron Firklepot are very concerned about their friend Ren Ronkle. They’ve gotten together every weekend for 32 years, rotating between houses, to watch the NASCAR race.
They barbecue some food, drink Bud Light, and cheer on their favorite drivers. Lately though, Ronkle has started cheering when and only when there is a crash.
“We are very concerned because he’s changed. He sits there cheering and yelling, praying for a crash and when there finally is one, he goes nuts screaming and cheering. The worse the crash, the more excited he gets. I don’t understand why he can’t just enjoy watching cars drive around in a circle for four hours straight like the rest of us,” said Tobacwad.
The super manly southern friends stated that an intervention or therapy is for ‘wimps’ so if Ren keeps up this behavior, they’ll just have to bring him out back behind the barn and shoot him.