LINCOLN, NE – A local Lincoln man is reportedly thinking fondly of simpler times when he and his friend murdered hitchhikers for fun.
“Ah, I remember back in the day when Larry and I would head out with a smile on our face and kill a bunch of strange hitchhikers. Those were the times,” said local man Eli Mega.
“There isn’t anything stronger in the world than nostalgia. Nostalgia is the greatest supplement to the state of euphoria and I love thinking about those days when we’d kill those fuckers.”