Man Eliminates Possibility of Breathing In COVID-19 By Sawing Off Nose and Mouth

GLENDALE, AZ – With the constant worry of getting the dreaded COVID-19 virus, a local Arizona man reportedly sawed his mouth and nose off to eliminate the possibility of getting the virus.

“Yeah, I can’t speak anymore or breathe properly, but at least I won’t get this virus or have to wear a mask. I know vaccines are going to be more available soon, but I figured I’d do this sooner than later,” Jerry Long wrote into a pad.

“People always look at me weird, but hey, I’m not getting that virus. I think I’m way ahead of the curve and people should consider doing what I’m doing. If they’re too scared to do it, I’ll saw their mouth and nose off for them.”