Man Confusingly Excited to Eat Candy When Sugar Drops

DES MOINES, IA – Local man Johnny Friendly was very excited at his recent doctor’s appointment after being diagnosed with adult onset diabetes. Unlike most people who would be upset with the bad news, Mr. Friendly confused the diagnosis to eat candy when his sugar drops.

“I’ve always loved eating sweets but always felt ashamed because of how bad they are for you. But now that I have diabetes, I can eat sweets and candy all the time with no shame and no regrets,” said Mr. Friendly.

When reporters tried explaining that this isn’t good news at all as he could lose fingers, toes, limbs, and eventually his life from diabetes, Mr. Friendly shrugged reporters off, claiming the doctors will save him if anything bad happens.