BATON ROUGE, LA – Local plumber Bill “Porky” Chompton misses the old days before COVID-19 when he could compensate for what he’s lacking by crushing another man’s hand with his handshake.
“A good old-fashioned manly handshake is what I miss most that Covid has taken away from us. Sure, both my parents died from Covid but I definitely miss shaking other men’s hands the most. I broke 3 other men’s hands throughout my life with my hard manly handshaking,” said Porky.
Instead, Porky declared he’s now bankrupting himself by putting tens of thousands of dollars into his manly muscle car to try and compensate for what he’s lacking.
Many hope handshaking, especially the ridiculous crush your hand kind, becomes a forgotten relic of the past even after COVID-19 is gone.