KANSAS CITY, MO – A local Kansas man is reportedly pleading for people to get on their knees and worship the police as a way for us to ‘all get along’, while the police brutally murdered his son for not stopping at a stop sign all the way.
“I understand the police threw my son out of his car and had dogs eat him because he didn’t stop at a stop sign, but that’s not important. What’s important is we respect the boys in blue and promise to back them for their heroic jobs,” said Kansas man Jeffrey Dell.
“I loved killing that kid, it was so much fun. The worst-case scenario is I’ll get a temporary leave of absence but that’s a free vacation in my book. We have all these dummies protecting us and it’s great!” said Officer Dick Benn.