Grocery Stores to Add Automatic Turrets that’ll Shoot Anyone Who Doesn’t Walk Their Shopping Cart Back
ROCHESTER, NY – After a string of grocery stores continued to feel annoyed at customers who refuse to walk their grocery cart back after loading their car, a list of local Rochester grocery stores have decided to add automatic turrets that’ll shoot anyone who doesn’t return their cart.
The turret initiative comes after employees at a local Wegmans told management about their frustration with customers who refused to walk their grocery cart back. After discussing with upper management about it, the grocery chain felt the need to act.
“Honestly, it’s a win-win for humanity and us. The world is better off without these people who don’t walk their cart backs and leave them in a parking lot. It saves us time and eliminates a bunch of useless people,” said CEO of Wegmans, Colleen Wegman.
“At this point, if you can’t return your cart back during a global pandemic, you deserve to get shot multiple times by a turret. As long as you follow the rules, you’ll be fine.”
The turrets are expected to be installed by mid-September and are expected to carry full rounds of ammunition and missiles for customers who try to run to their car.