Family’s Second Self-Quarantine Goes Well After Chaining Father in Basement for Making too Many Knock-Knock Jokes

UTICA, NY – After promising to spend the second wave of COVID-19 together in quarantine as a family, a local Utica family is reporting their quarantining has been going well since they chained their father in their basement as a result of his excessive use of knock-knock jokes.

“I couldn’t take it anymore and had to act on an impulse. I usually don’t mind him, but he wouldn’t shut-up with these dumb jokes. Something had to be done so we locked him in the basement for good,” said Daughter Chelsea Scott.

“I know why they’re mad at me, but I was just trying to add a bit of excitement to this boring life. We’re all quarantining together so we might as well tell some jokes! They haven’t fed me in a few days, I’m starting to get hungry,” said Father Tom Scott.