Disney World Reopens so People Can Have the Chance to Ride Splash Mountain While Getting COVID-19

ORLANDO, FL – With a massive increase in COVID-19 cases surging across the country, Disney World is proudly opening their gates that’ll allow people the opportunity to ride their favorite Disney rides while getting COVID-19.

“We’re proud to open in such a time where people need nothing but the loving fun of a Disney World adventure. Will people die? Sure, but we’ll make money regardless,” said Disney CEO Bob Chapek.

Considering the increases in COVID-19 cases in Florida, most might assume going to Disney World isn’t the brightest idea, however that hasn’t stopped local Florida man Larry Jennings to bring his family to the park.

“I don’t care what this virus is or what it does, I just want to go on a few rollercoasters and eat mediocre food. I’m American, which means I do what I want,”

Jennings and his family have a 90 percent chance of getting COVID-19 while at the park, but that isn’t affecting Jennings’s choice on the matter.

“We’ll wash our hands occasionally, but other than that, we’ll be fine. There’s nothing to worry about!”