WASHINGTON Senate Republicans announced an agreement with Senate Democrats on an infrastructure bill this week. There is no announcement on the price tag or contents of the bill yet but this bill has been in discussion for quite some time. “We have finally reached an agreement on an infrastructure bill allowing the construction of four […]Read More

TOLEDO, OH – Local self-proclaimed moderate, George Dipslipper, isn’t a fan of Joe Biden, but isn’t a fan of Trump either. A rare Republican who voted for Biden, Dipslipper hopes people like Senator Mitt Romney can steer his party away from Trump and back to what he calls true Republicanism. “I just admire people like […]Read More

DALLAS, TX – Former President George W. Bush is outraged after hearing President Biden will be pulling all remaining U.S. troops out of Afghanistan in September. “This is horrible news for the United States. We shouldn’t leave until we are done killing every remaining person in that country. Instead, we are gonna pay for it […]Read More

DALLAS, TX – A giant American flag orgy broke out at the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) on Sunday after former President Trump started making out with the American flag that was on stage. Former President Trump was blathering about how he lost the election and how much he loves the United States when he […]Read More

BILLINGS, MT – Local Snake Wrangler, Jethro Lee Talcumpowder loves the United States so much that it brings tears to his eyes. “This is the greatest country in the history of the planet. Living here is by far the greatest privilege you could ever hope for and it makes us all so extremely lucky. This […]Read More

LITTLE ROCK, AK – A favorite talking point shared amongst Republicans is that they’re the political party of Abraham Lincoln, one of America’s most celebrated and beloved Presidents. “To all you democrats out there, all you gotta do is look at Abraham Lincoln, the greatest President we’ve ever had and a Republican, to know that […]Read More

WASHINGTON – A new $1.2 trillion infrastructure deal, from five Democratic and five Republican senators is expected to build one or two sidewalks to the crumbling U.S. infrastructure. Although the deal isn’t expected to pass, many experts note that in order to fix U.S. infrastructure, a deal needs to be well over $10 trillion, ten […]Read More

WASHINGTON – A new law was recently signed with public support, allowing waiters and waitresses to rightfully execute any customer that overly complains. The law came into the public discussion when many Americans agreed that anyone who overly complains and is rude to waiters and waitresses, deserves nothing but death. “My colleagues and I pressured […]Read More

DALLAS, TX – Texas Governor Greg Abbott signed into law a bill legalizing the open carry of bazookas without a permit even needed in the state. “The government needs to stop interfering with the people’s right to bear arms, and this law is another step towards that goal. Who are we to stop them from […]Read More