BIRMINGHAM, AL – Local American Ronnie Ron, 29, reportedly realizes how shit the United States is after visiting Belgium for one day.
“I can’t believe I’ve been lied to my entire life. Everything is better in Europe. The U.S. is utter shit, and I’m bummed,” said Ron.
Ron is expected to leave all possessions and family behind in the U.S. after deeming it all “Shit.”